Yesterday I had to run a few errands for mother. Being the nice guy I am and having other motives and incentives for stepping out, why not? I thought it would be also convenient to stop by at a fancy gym nearby. Walking in, the first thing immediately noticeable is the smacking stench of chlorine of the swimming pool just yards away from the reception desk. I thought 'Now that's a bit of me'.. somehow I walked out as I wasn't quite up to touring the premises. In retrospect, maybe I ought to have done. Can't I follow things through and have a little BACKBONE once in a while??
This morning a few cds came through the post, lovely. Included the new Lovvers single, Lightspeed Champion album, Vetiver remixes and The Boggs album. They'll all be added snugly to my playlist, which at the moment consists of the following:
Pavement - Wowee Zowee, Slanted & Enchanted albums
Burial - Untrue
M.I.A. - Kala
Justice - Cross
Madvillain - Madvillainy
MF Doom (Various)
Wu-Tang Clan, Ghostface Killah, RZA (various)
Mew - Frengers
Von Sudenfed album
Various Dub, Bashment, Ragga
I'm sure there are many omissions from the above list. But no matter. That's what I've been mostly listening to these last weeks. Lots of Myspace stuff too such as These New Puritans, South Central, Laura Groves, Nic Nell, Metronomy, I really could go on here.
Just these last few minutes I've spent googling Asperger's Syndrome for some odd reason. Don't get me wrong, I've had a reasonably good day, Man U won 6-0, we went top of the league and as long as that's the case then my world's a steady Eddie. But I just watched a programme on Channel 4 on a few people who even at middle age have their virginity intact. Maybe my anti-social behaviour from AS is a direct reason for my misreading signals, etc. Could it be that as much as I try not to harbour myself with a label on my forehead, it's no use denying I have a mental disorder, or worse, disability?
In 2 weeks I'll be 24 years of age, I dread to think what will happen on that day. There's an awkwardness I find irksome about special days like I have to 'be' or 'act' a certain way that's alien or unusual. I like routine, I don't like change. Maybe I like being inside my own bubble? Then OK. Fine. I'm a lonesome, mentally disorientated, mid-twenties shy and awkward hermit.
I'm going to watch a couple of films. Night.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment